Thought Question: Making Your Kids Hate Church

Posted on April 25, 2011 by Jay F Guin

How to make your kids hate church, as suggested by the Resurgence —

1. Make sure your faith is only something you live out in public

2. Pray only in front of people

3. Focus on your morals

4. Give financially as long as it doesn’t impede your needs

5. Make church community a priority… as long as there is nothing else you want to do

Read the very brief article and come back here to discuss what you think of it.

About Jay F Guin

My name is Jay Guin, and I’m a retired elder. I wrote The Holy Spirit and Revolutionary Grace about 18 years ago. I’ve spoken at the Pepperdine, Lipscomb, ACU, Harding, and Tulsa lectureships and at ElderLink. My wife’s name is Denise, and I have four sons, Chris, Jonathan, Tyler, and Philip. I have two grandchildren. And I practice law.
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9 Responses to Thought Question: Making Your Kids Hate Church

  1. guy says:
    April 25, 2011 at 7:52 am

    i don't know. i had an upbringing that resembled this in some ways, but i didn't end up hating religion.

    There are some people who live like this but not out of hypocrisy, but out of just laziness. They really do want to do better but don't. i also think some people live like this because that's what they believe real Christianity to entail.

    Then again, some kids get a really great Christian upbringing and end up hating religion anyway. i think this article more or less oversimplifies.

    –guy

  2. Adam says:
    April 25, 2011 at 11:04 am

    It won't teach them to hate church – just to recognize it as irrelevant shallow, and deceitful.

  3. Alabama John says:
    April 25, 2011 at 1:38 pm

    None of the above affects children later in life as much as what is spoken by the grown folks on the way to services (Church) and on the trip back home.

  4. aBasnar says:
    April 25, 2011 at 2:59 pm

    If childrem experience church as an extended family, they will grow into it naturally. All "brothers and Sisters in Christ" are "uncles and Aunties" to them, and they should feel that and be seen as "nephews and nieces".

    If church is more than sitting still for an hour or so, but a time of family-fellowship as well, I don't fear for our kids.

    Alexander

  5. Jack Wellman says:
    April 25, 2011 at 5:02 pm

    What a great set of diagnostic questions or statements. As a pastor, my children have greater (unreasonable?) expectations on them and this is a constant reminder to me that they are still children and no different from others in the church. I ensure that I do not put any more expectations on them than I would my own self or other church members children. Nicely done.

  6. Neal says:
    April 25, 2011 at 9:38 pm

    Ezekiel 22:23-31 We humans tend to repeat ourselves.Religion is not what we are called to yet we can’t help but build that tower once we all speak the same language. How can we like Paul see the saving grace and love of God believing all things written in the law and prophets, Acts 24:14 and yet not build a false edifice that resists His Spirit?

  7. Mark Littleton says:
    April 26, 2011 at 10:58 am

    OK, I get 1, 2, 4 and 5. But I'm not getting #3 for some reason. "Focus on your morals." How does focussing on morality cause our kids to hate church? Admittedly, I'm thick, and I'm obviously missing something…

  8. Jay Guin says:
    April 26, 2011 at 7:55 pm

    Mark,

    The author’s explanation is —

    Make sure you insist your kids be honest with you. Let them know it is the right thing for them to do, but then feel free to lie in your own life and disregard the need to tell them and others the truth. Get very angry with your children when they say words that are “naughty” and “bad,” but post, read, watch, and say whatever you want on TV, Facebook, and Twitter. Make sure you focus on being a good person. Be ambiguous about what this means.

  9. Mark Littleton says:
    April 26, 2011 at 9:53 pm

    Ah, got it. Makes sense now! Thanks.

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