Marriage
Imagine that two devout Christians get married, with the preacher, bridesmaids, the whole works. They later have two children. Ten years later, the husband discovers that the preacher forgot to sign the wedding certificate. A lawyer tells him that his marriage is legally invalid (wouldn’t be true in Alabama, but assume it’s true wherever you live). Would it be sin for the man to abandon his “wife” and children, and then go marry a pretty young thing?
Well, to a heartless legalist, the man would be leaving a relationship of fornication and entering into the holy estate of matrimony. But most people would see it as God surely would — as sin. He made a commitment and he needs to keep it. Even though the ceremony was done wrong, he’s bound to his commitment.
Nor can he abandon his children because the ceremony was wrong. You see, the commitment is vastly more important than the rite.
It’s not a perfect analogy, but hopefully it shows the danger of treating baptism in a legalistic fashion. (Amazing that some argue from marriage that the legalities of baptism matter more than the commitment! That’s upside down.) What really matters is the commitment made and the resulting relationship. He’s confessed his love for his bride and declared his intention to be married to her. She did the same. Technically right or not, in their hearts they were married, and in God’s eyes, they became bound to each other.
No, he cannot leave and marry the pretty young thing. In fact, to do so would be a grave sin.
The normal case
And so, yes, baptism matters. Indeed, baptism is normally, by design, the moment when faith is confessed, commitment is made, the body in joined, and the Kingdom is entered — all by the power of God, due to the faith of the convert. This is when the Spirit is received. Normally.
A defective baptism does the same thing. Obviously, botching the baptism is a serious mistake by the church, but for the convert, it works well enough. God does not damn because a Baptist minister baptizes a convert to obey an ordinance because of salvation already received — all in a Baptist baptistry in a Baptist church.
The baptism takes and the mistake is not all that serious in the grand scheme of things. You know, we tend to exaggerate how terrible these things are because we’ve been debating the topic for over a century. And debates distort the importance of the issue under consideration.
(My oldest son used to debate in high school. He learned that to win, he had to “prove” that his opponent’s position on DDT, EPA emission standards, or whatever would inevitably result in nuclear holocaust! We in the Chruches of Christ tend to debate at about that level. That’s why we sometimes teach that every mistake damns. That’s how people try to win debates — at a high school level.)
An arranged marriage
One more story. A couple is married at the age of 8 days. They are from a province in India where the parents arrange and make marriages for their children.
Many years later, when the children are of age, there’s a ceremony designed to confirm the marriage. According to the law, either one could refuse to confirm the marriage, but rarely does anyone do that. Rather, they remain true to their upbringing and voluntarily go through the confirmation ceremony.
The boy and girl, now 21, have never met and may well have never confessed their love for each other. But they are genuinely committed to the marriage. Indeed, these marriages have a better success rate than Western marriage built on romantic love and the passions of the young couple.*
In God’s eyes, is the Indian couple married? If so, when were they married — according to God? When their parents declared them married, with the parents making vows for their children? When the ceremony was held when they were babies? Or when they confirmed that decision? And does it matter all that much?
Well, what if the couple refuses to go through the confirmation ceremony? Is that a divorce in God’s eyes?
Well — you know what? — I’m not sure I know the answer. But this much I know: if they confirm the marriage, they’re married — even though the ceremony is contrary to the marriage practices we read about in the Bible.
Infant baptism
Now, I oppose infant baptism. I think it’s an unhealthy practice for the body of Christ. After all, in nations where infant baptism is nearly universal, the church is extremely weak. Evidently, the church does a very poor job of making confirmation a real confirmation. It can easily become too much ritual and not enough substance.
But, of course, Churches of Christ have sometimes so focused on baptism that more than a large percentage of the teens who are baptized do so out of social pressure and not a real commitment to God. Yes, we can do the rite exactly right as a matter of form and theology and yet still get the heart of the rite entirely wrong. Of course, you can also do the rite wrong and get the heart wrong. And God certainly wants the rite right and the heart rite. But the heart is the thing that matters ultimately.
(1Sa 16:7b ESV) “For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”
Conclusions
I think the original design of baptism is not only God’s design, but the best possible design. God’s wisdom in providing for a confession followed by baptism of a believer is how churches ought to act.
Words are necessary, but words can be cheap. Asking for an action as evidence of faith helps confirm in the heart of the convert that faith requires certain behaviors. It’s not just words.
And baptism powerfully illustrates what God is doing. It’s a death, burial, and resurrection, and it’s a cleansing from sin. The symbolism is powerful.
To a Jew, the waters of baptism would symbolize the Spirit as well a new crossing of the Red Sea.
(Isa 44:3 ESV) For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour my Spirit upon your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.
(1Co 10:1-4a NET) For I do not want you to be unaware, brothers and sisters, that our fathers were all under the cloud and all passed through the sea, 2 and all were baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea, 3 and all ate the same spiritual food, 4 and all drank the same spiritual drink.
It’s a shame that these symbols have been forgotten in our teaching.
And John the Baptist would tell us that baptism symbolizes repentance — forcing an announced decision.
(Luk 3:3 NET) 3 He went into all the region around the Jordan River, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins.
Just as an unspoken apology is not good enough, repentance that’s not announced reveals a lack of commitment. God’s forgiveness announced through John required a change of heart that was real enough that the penitent person would let John immerse him.
Moreover, the convert is baptized by a believer, who hears his confession. The baptism therefore symbolizes the believer’s admission into the Kingdom and the congregation.
And the baptism forces a confession: that cleansing is required and that a death is needed. It matters.
But merely getting the form of confession and baptism right is pretty useless unless you also get the heart right. And this is where many confirmation practices and many baptismal practices err. You see, if the goal is to get a child through a ritual so the parents can sleep at night, that’s the wrong goal. Our goal has to be for our children to become disciples of Jesus — not merely students but students who desperately want to be just like Jesus.
And, sadly, most of our baptisms don’t do this. But that’s a topic for another day in the not too distant future. Just to say it succinctly: the goal isn’t baptism. The goal is discipleship — which will include baptism and a host of other things. But baptism no more makes you a good parent than physical birth makes you a good parent. The real test is what comes later.
But baptism, done right, is a powerful way to be introduced into the Kingdom. It’s an act of submission. Think about it — the convert’s life is in the hands of the person doing the immersion! For a moment, buried in the suffocating, cold water, the believer is truly helpless, with no way out except the embrace of the immerser. If ever you have to trust someone with your life, it’s when you’re being baptized!
And in this sense, the immerser symbolizes Jesus. When we go under the water, we submit ourselves into the hands of Christ just as we yield to the hands of the immerser. We decide to rely entirely on the hands and strength of Jesus for breath and life, just as we rely on the hands and strength of the immerser. Baptism is truly an act of faith!
The improperly baptized
Does God save the improperly baptized? Yes — we can rest assured that, despite our poor baptismal teaching and even our denial that the Spirit enters the convert at baptism, God saves our imperfectly baptized converts, just as he saves imperfectly baptized converts in other denominations. That’s what God does. For those with faith, he forgives our sins and overlooks our errors.
(Gen 15:6 ESV) 6 And he believed the LORD, and he counted it to him as righteousness.
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* Not as unrealistic an example as you might imagine. Until the last century, child marriages had been practiced in India for centuries, and remain practiced today in a few places. After the government imposed a law requiring that the couple be at least 18 (bride) and 21 (groom), previously made marriages would have become illegal and so would require confirmation when the participants reach legal age. I make no claim of any expertise in Indian marriage law. I’m just saying the example is well within the realm of possibility.
Some may misunderstand the relationship between taking away sin and baptism. We point again to Acts 2:38, the apostolic answer to the most important question ever asked by believers in Jesus, “What must we do?” God’s answer is that those who believe in Jesus as Lord must turn to Him AS LORD and be baptized AS HE COMMANDS is to be done.
Those who act in obedience are assured they will receive remission of sins and “the gift of the Holy Spirit.” We note that the Spirit doesn’t CAUSE the baptism or perform the baptism. He is given by God AFTER the person has turned to Jesus and accepted the baptism in water commanded by Jesus and performed by HUMAN hands.
Dear Brother Ray
What do you do with Acts 10:44-48 where the Holy Spirit is given to gentiles, Cornelius family, before they were baptized.
44 While Peter was still speaking these words, the Holy Spirit came on all who heard the message. 45 The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on Gentiles. 46 For they heard them speaking in tongues[b] and praising God.
Then Peter said, 47 “Surely no one can stand in the way of their being baptized with water. They have received the Holy Spirit just as we have.” 48 So he ordered that they be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. Then they asked Peter to stay with them for a few days.
Apparently, God through Christ gave his holy spirit, and salvation, to Cornelius and his family, servants. bacause of their great faith, BEFORE, they were baptized. This passage in Acts 10 doesn’t fit in our patented COC baptism theocracy list of HBCRB.
Yours in Christ
Anthony Hipps
Anthony,
Are you certain that Cornelius was even lost (unsaved) prior to Acts 10? Didn’t Jesus say that before the Jews and Gentiles would become one flock (in the form of the church), that there were two flocks of God’s Sheep?
Didn’t the Gentiles have their own law (other than the Law if Moses) and couldn’t they be faithful and forgiven under it?
Do you believe that every Gentile prior to Acts 10 was lost and had no chance of forgiveness, no matter how they lived or what they believed?
How do you know for sure that Cornelius was living his life as an unforgiven sinner? The Jews could be saved and forgiven based on their faith, right?
But, the Gentiles couldn’t?
Ray, I like the answer love God and your neighbor answer from Jesus best.
Hank, it always bothers me when that “too bad they all went to hell” is spoken at an ancient cemetery.
Same thinking and teaching at a funeral today if the person was not a member of the conservative COC. Best to get a denominational preacher to handle your loved ones funerals.
Jay wrote:
I remember hearing Parker Henderson tell of a time while he was in Thailand. He had baptized the son of a tribal chief who became very upset about the baptism. The chief insisted that Parker “unbaptize” the young man. Parker explained there was no way he could do that – that it would be like trying to put a baby back into the womb. This apparently satisfied the chief. (I wish I knew how things turned out for the young man and his commitment to Jesus, but Parker didn’t tell that ending.)
Hank,
Regarding whether Cornelius was saved in Acts 10,
(Acts 15:8–9 ESV) 8 And God, who knows the heart, bore witness to them, by giving them the Holy Spirit just as he did to us, 9 and he made no distinction between us and them, having cleansed their hearts by faith.
“Cleansed their hearts” sure sounds like their hearts needed a good cleansing.
(Acts 11:17–18 ESV) 17 If then God gave the same gift to them as he gave to us when we believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I that I could stand in God’s way?” 18 When they heard these things they fell silent. And they glorified God, saying, “Then to the Gentiles also God has granted repentance that leads to life.”
Again, Luke records that Cornelius’ conversion was not moving from saved by the Gentile law to saved by Christ, but “repentance that leads to life.”
Peter’s sermon — surely an inspired utterance — concluded with —
(Acts 10:43 ESV) 43 “To him all the prophets bear witness that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”
And so Peter seems to have thought he was preaching to someone in need of forgiveness.
Luke makes it clear that Cornelius needed Jesus because he needed forgiveness, cleansing of his heart, and eternal life — meaning he did not already have these things.
PS — I can’t find where McGarvey argued that the Gentiles pre-Pentecost were saved. Do you have a citation for that?
This is the peoples situation in the world today: Bible Statistics
The Bible is by far the most translated book in the world. Here is a look at its global reach:
Total number of languages in the world: 6,912…Total with some Scripture: 2,426…Total with a complete New Testament 1,144…Total with a full Bible: 429…Total new languages with work currently in progress: 1,640…The number of people who speak languages where translation projects have not yet begun: 196,000,000.
562 US recognized Native American Tribes in the USA today and only some have Luke, Mark or John only (and many don’t have ANY bible books) translated in their language.
Are we to believe all these plus all those of the past are lost? That is what the Church of Christ has taught and most still teach.
Heck, we who have many versions of the whole bible cannot agree with one another.
Surely we will admit somethings wrong with our thinking!
Alabama John,
The instructions that we are given is to teach of God and Christ. We were never given the authority to judge God about how he will deal with those who have not heard the words that we have been given. My point is that when we even offer that we believe that God should not hold them accountable to the words that we have been given, the fact remains that God has identified that all are lost without Jesus. We are only expected to teach what we have received. If we attempt to authorize any other words of salvation to men (their own concepts learned by nature, or what ever) we are altering God’s Words.
We have an interesting fiction when discussing marriage. We think that we can define “when they were married — according to God”. Because God has never told us that, and we debate from a position of ignorance.
God has told us more–through the Bible–about salvation, but the inspired writers apparently weren’t that concerned with the “when.” They were explaining “how” and “why.” Of course it’s an interesting discussion, and it has kept us occupied and divided for centuries now. Since Salvation is largely something God does, rather than something we do, I wonder whether He really intended for us to make such a big deal about what order we do things in?
Cool move Ralph.
Jay, a couple at our congregation early in our marriage was made war on by a conservative group in the church. The elders resigned, there were numerous meetings, and at one point our men’s “business meeting” was secretly recorded by a visiting guest minister who later wrote letters to the local “Brotherhood.” The couple’s sin? One of them had been divorced before their marriage and before their conversion. Six years after coming to salvation at the church they were told to break the marriage because of fornication. The church split and now there are two in a small community. All Hell rejoiced. So many baptisms were killed that year. What of all the baptisms done by this wicked group of people since. It is as raw today as when it happened. Such pain over when we are saved or committed to one another. What of 2 Peter 2:19-21, the Word is not being correctly interpreted all around us all the time and still people shout out that we have do it just so or you are lost? No wonder young adults say we don’t make sense.
Neal, Wow, what a mess. So sorry.
Neal,
The divorce and remarriage controversy has likely damaged more congregations than any single issue other than contention over support for orphanages back in the 50s. I’ve seen Satan win many a battle over MDR.
There was a book published a long time ago, maybe in late 60s or early 70s, demonstrating that the early church never rejected a couple for a prior divorce and marriage, uniformly treating the marriage as cleansed by baptism — despite the early church’s very narrow, very legalistic view on marriage and divorce. I can’t remember the name of the book or the author, but maybe a reader here will.
Sorry about the diversion, the marriage comparison hit me in a bad way. Romans 2:4 says it well, where Paul unleashes on us about God’s judgment. God leads us to repentance, which is where my days always end up. At the feet of Jesus. What this broken world needs is to know the source of the goodness they understand. Somehow they have to be able to see that Jesus in me. How can that happen if all that matters is the what, when, how, and the precision of these responses? Let God be God. It ain’t me their looking for.
Sometimes we cannot see the forest for the trees because we have focused on one tree and decided that it is the best tree and should represent all trees and that the other trees are really of no concern. This shouldn’t be the case with the scripture. Scripture stands together or falls apart together or rather we rip it apart and dissect. There are many working parts to salvation even after one is “saved” and the promise is held in heaven. Our acceptance of Christ is nothing but us bowing down to Christ as our King and making a covenant with Him through His blood. Sometimes we just have to go with scripture without having it all figured out or understood, because things can come later.
MDR is another subject where we have latched upon somethings and pounded people mercesly with it. It is as if they didn’t have these things in the apostles times with the Roman citizens and yet it wasn’t a bigger issue than loving each other and unity. We again want to be the gate keeper and don’t realize that we haven’t reached the gate oursleves.
Larry, I agree that if we don’t know we should shut up. That goes for those saying all those are lost as well.
WE have preached far more on who is lost than celebrating who is saved.
Ultimately it comes down to how we see God in our own mind. WE can each take verses chosen for our purpose and PROVE either position. Choose to be negative or positive about God, our choice.