In honor of high school graduation, a simple, desultory phillipic.
By way of background –
Which allows you to sing along with (all together now) –
Thanks to XKCD.
Loved it when I saw it this morning. Soon after it was posted someone already had a performance of it up on youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gu1VhsNOwPU
This reminds me of the high school entertainers at a church banquet for juniors & seniors (in lieu of a prom) where the after-dinner speaker was the president of Ohio Valley College. They sang (very enthusiastically) “I don’t need no education.”
Pink Floyd and the Prez of OVC? There’s an unexpected combination.
For our kids on other end of University Drive, graduation approaches, and it’s hard to remember everything for this event. As in–
A. Don’t forget to select your individualized “cap accessories”, to be attached to the top of your mortarboard. Suggestions include
1. Portrait of George Washington (history)
2. Portrait of Shakespeare (English)
3. Radiation placard (physics),
4. Biohazard symbol (pre-med),
5. Smiley face (elementary education),
6. Dead frog (biology)
7. Beaker (chemistry),
8. Working miniature catalytic cracker (chemical engineering),
9. Pile of dirt (civil engineering),
10. Food stamp application (humanities)
B. If you must wear sneakers to the ceremony, the dean asks that you refrain from wearing the Skechers that light up.
C. Please advise your proud family members that anyone using an air horn to celebrate your accomplishment as you walk across the stage will be tasered by campus security.
D. Remember, your graduation snapshot will be a treasure for years to come. Your chance to make a goofy face in your school picture passed in the third grade.
E. Yes, commencement can be lengthy, but do NOT order pizza from Domino’s to be sent to your seat. This is disruptive and will likely result in your wiping marinara sauce on the dean as he hands you your diploma.
I particularly enjoyed this video version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdyoGruec88
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