Memorial Day Steaks A La Ruth’s Chris

I realize that there are bigger issues confronting the world, but lately I’ve been worried a lot about the price of steaks. It’s just really expensive to eat out, you know, and I don’t know whose fault it is. I’ll leave that to the politicians and economists to sort out. For me and my house, the answer is: cook your own.

And that salient observation led my son Tyler — a newly minted chemical engineer — and me to the Great Ruth’s Chris Steak Experiment.

You see, we love Ruth’s Chris Steak House steaks. We just don’t love paying the price. I have four sons. A daughter-in-law. Another soon-to-be daughter-in-law. They have friends. At $40 per steak, a la carte, Ruth’s Chris is just not an option.

So we decided to cook our own using my Big Green Egg. Now for those unfamiliar with the Egg, the BGE is a home grilling device that is just too cool not to have.

In fact, I’m aware of a recent divorce case that failed to settle because the spouses couldn’t agree on custody of their Egg. Really. They worked out the children but couldn’t settle on the Big Green Egg!

When we moved into our present house about 4 years ago, I had to leave my old barbecue grill behind — mainly because it was too rusted to survive the 1/8th mile trip.

So Christmas was coming up, and I asked for a replacement grill. Christmas morning, my wife had placed under the tree a tiny box with a tag inside saying, “Congratulations! You’re now the proud owner of Big Green Egg!”

I thought it was some kind of cruel joke — not at all like Denise — but I really had no idea why I’d get or even want a green egg for Christmas. I asked whether, inside another one of the boxes, there might be a big green ham!

But we soon traveled to the store and picked up the cooker — very heavy and made of ceramic. And the boys and I began experimenting with cooking with this unusual device. And we are hooked. It’s made some amazing meals.

But would it make a Ruth’s Chris steak? That would be, of course, the ultimate test. Ruth’s Chris makes steaks in 1800 degree ovens. There is no way to get the Egg that hot — and if we did, we couldn’t get close enough to put the steaks in.

We did the obligatory Google search for recipes and found several posts where others allegedly accomplished this Holy Grail of the barbecue science — most with unbelievable elements, such as cooking at 900 degrees (well above the maximum temp for a BGE) and using dry rubs to replicate the Ruth’s Chris experience (that’s just not how they do it).

And so we came up with our own recipe to try out. It’s pretty simple —

• Five 14 oz. steaks, thick cut, from Publix. Mixture of filets and ribeyes. (About $60 total, less than 1/3 the steakhouse price.)
• Salt.
• Pepper.
• Butter.

Generously salt and pepper the steaks. DO NOT butter them at this stage unless you like the outside charred — which some prefer, but it’s not my own preference. You see, the butter burns.

Prepare the Egg by cleaning out all dust and small bits of lump charcoal. Use fresh, big chunks for maximum air circulation.

Set the air vent wide open. Leave the top of the Egg closed and do not impede the air flow out.

Let the Egg get just as hot as it’ll get. For us, that was about 700 degrees. We tried using a hair dryer to get it even hotter, but it wouldn’t maintain the temperature and, well, 700 degrees is really, really hot.

If you’re cooking under a covering, move the Egg around — because it’ll look like a jet engine with flames leaping out of the top. If you don’t have a ceiling fan or something else to dissipate the heat, you could damage the ceiling or even catch it on fire.

Using the longest tongs you have (remember: 700 degree is REALLY hot), set the steaks on the grill and set a timer (we used an iPhone) for 4 minutes. At two minutes, open the lid, flip the steaks and close, but let the timer keep running. At four minutes, remove the steaks.

In four minutes, the steaks were a perfect just-barely medium rare. (If there’s another temperature at which steaks should be served, I’m not aware of it.)

In the meantime, take five oven-safe plates and heat them in the oven to 300 degrees so that they’re ready for the steaks just as soon as they come off the grill.

As you remove the steaks from the grill, put large pats of butter on the hot plates (not margarine, but real, made-by-cows butter). Lay steaks on melted butter, enjoy the sizzling sound, flip the steaks once, and let them continue cooking as you serve. Add more butter to taste. (Be sure the butter has warmed to at least room temperature. Don’t use cold butter.)

The result: just as good as the original — heaven served on a plate — except you made it yourself and saved hundreds of dollars.

Of course, the savings evaporate if you burn your house down in the process. So pay attention to whatever is directly overhead.

There are a few lessons we learned the hard way:

• The Egg got so hot that the glue holding down the felt that protects the BGE on closure caught fire. The hair dryer idea sounded really smart in prospect — not so smart in retrospect. Don’t use the hair dryer.
• Like I said, pre-buttering the steaks results in a charred outside. It was fine, but I’d have preferred to do without.
• Did I say that 700 degrees is really hot? You have to have some long tongs.
• This is not a solo job. It takes at least two (three is better: Thanks, Zach) because timing is so critical. You’d hate to burn $65 worth of steaks to charcoal just because you aren’t willing to share with friends and family. It’s a community operation. And what’s more manly than meticulously coordinated team work around a hot fire?
• I’m serious about the steaks being thick cut. Your standard Western Sizzlin’-cut steaks will turn to ash before you can flip them.

Enjoy. Cook with friends. Expect to lose the hair on your knuckles. It’s really hot.