One In Jesus

I know what the answers will be on the blog if you did write about it. I am very conflicted and confused about everything while trying to recover from my addiction. I have a therapist and a psychiatrist but no one that is in the church of Christ to talk to about it. I’m too embarrassed and afraid to talk to my minister’s about it. I have no idea why I am writing you this email. For some reason God lead me to do so. Anyway, obviously I wish to remain anonymous and thank you for reading this, if you made it this far! Sorry it’s so lengthy.

Again, I’m humbled at even the thought that God may have led you to me in your struggles. I don’t feel even a little qualified. I’ve tried as best I can be honest about the church and homosexuality, and I hope I’ve been of some help.

As I’ve been typing, a vague recollection of something C. S. Lewis wrote a long time ago came to me, and I finally found the quote. I think this may be of some help to you. It makes a lot of sense to me. Continue reading →

My question is why doesn’t the church talk about it? Why is it so hush hush? Do people really think that it’s not an issue that needs to be talked about? That there’s no way a gay person could be in a church of Christ because that kind of thing just can’t happen? The only time I’ve heard it preached on from the pulpit was when I was a member at Oak Hills in San Antonio and one Sunday Max preached a sermon condemning gay marriage, about 3 years ago or so.

This is an important question. I agree with you that there are many single men and women in the Churches of Christ chastely living as Christians while keeping their homosexual natures a closely guarded secret.

And I agree that having to keep this a secret places an unfair burden on them. On the other hand, I think we do a lousy job of supporting heterosexuals in living chastely, too. And I agree that we need to talk more openly and frankly about sex. Pretending it’s not a problem only means the problem isn’t being dealt with. Continue reading →

Yet, I haven’t 100% rejected the idea that being gay is OK with God. You can’t just undo a lifetime of being taught homosexuality is the worst possible sin in a short period of time.

No, it’s not the worst possible sin. Jesus himself said so.

(Mat 10:14-15) If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake the dust off your feet when you leave that home or town. 15 I tell you the truth, it will be more bearable for Sodom and Gomorrah on the day of judgment than for that town.

Jesus said that those who reject the gospel will suffer a worse fate than the men of Sodom and Gomorrah. But there’s more. You see, in the N. T. Wright interview quoted in part 1, Wright denies that homosexual conduct is the worst of all sins. He then gives the example of economic oppression by Western nations that is keeping many poorer nations trapped in poverty. He was surely thinking of such passages as –

(Isa 1:10-17) “Hear the word of the LORD, you rulers of Sodom; listen to the law of our God, you people of Gomorrah!

11 “The multitude of your sacrifices– what are they to me?” says the LORD. “I have more than enough of burnt offerings, of rams and the fat of fattened animals; I have no pleasure in the blood of bulls and lambs and goats. 12 When you come to appear before me, who has asked this of you, this trampling of my courts? 13 Stop bringing meaningless offerings! Your incense is detestable to me. New Moons, Sabbaths and convocations– I cannot bear your evil assemblies. 14 Your New Moon festivals and your appointed feasts my soul hates. They have become a burden to me; I am weary of bearing them. 15 When you spread out your hands in prayer, I will hide my eyes from you; even if you offer many prayers, I will not listen. Your hands are full of blood; 16 wash and make yourselves clean. Take your evil deeds out of my sight! Stop doing wrong, 17 learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.”

Why did Isaiah compare the Israelites to Sodom and Gomorrah? Because they didn’t help the widows and orphans. Because they didn’t help the weak and vulnerable of society.

Consider also –

(Ezek 16:49-50) “‘Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. 50 They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen.”

“Detestable things” translates the word the KJV translates “abomination,” the same word used of a man lying with a man as with a woman in the Law of Moses. This is why Ezekiel refers to his listeners as “Sodom.” But the sin was not homosexuality, it was a lack of compassion for the poor.

Now, the Law of Moses refers to several sins as an abomination, including homosexual acts, idolatry, eating unclean foods, and using false weights to defraud a customer. Such sexual, religious, and economic sins are all abominations before God. Are homosexual acts an abomination? Yes, but so are many other things.

Adultery was a capital crime under the Law of Moses.

Which does more harm, consensual sex between two unmarried men? or between a married man and an unmarried woman? I can tell you for a fact that the adultery does far more harm! I’ve seen it. I know.

Now, I don’t want to get into the business of ranking sins! There’d be little point in such an exercise, were it even possible. But there is simply no argument that homosexual sin is the worst of all sins. On the other hand, neither is there any case for trivializing it. It’s just that we have to keep things in proper perspective.

The thought of gay sex is revolting to most straight people, whereas adultery is a temptation that we straights can easily understand. As a result of its foreign-ness, we tend to attach a far greater weight to it than the scriptures actually justify. God, however, does not make homosexual misconduct a worse sin than heterosexual misconduct.

I am about to give up the church of Christ because I can’t go on living a lie. If people in my singles class and my minister knew how I really am, I would be condemned and whatever else. Living a lie makes you an alcoholic or a drug addict and you can add any other vice. It’s also very exhausting.

My heart goes out to you. I mean, the last thing any Christian should ever have to do is live a lie. If the attitudes of the rest of us — we straights — force you to lie, then we’re the sinners. Continue reading →

There are many theories on how the meaning of the passages dealing with homosexuality could be interpreted and I have read the gay side of the story and the idea that the scriptures have been mistranslated or have lost their original meaning makes a lot of sense. Also, Jesus accepted everyone and never once said anything about homosexuality.

N. T. Wright addresses those theories in the conversation quoted in the first post of this series. Let me just add this thought about the words of Jesus.

Jesus spoke to a Jewish audience in the First Century. The Law of Moses teaches that homosexual acts are an “abomination” or, as the NIV translates, a “detestable act.” Many other improper sexual acts were also condemned, such as adultery. All came to be referred to as “fornication” in Jewish speech of the day. Continue reading →

What do you think?

(I’m not a rap fan, but I find myself reconsidering my position on that …)

Anonymous commented,

When I say lonely, I’m talking about not having a life partner. I think getting the alcohol out of my system and my life made me realize the loneliness that exists. I can’t drink it away and numb myself anymore.

I’ve spent the day pondering the question of loneliness. When I read your comment, my first thought was to go look at the Blue Like Jazz lesson material. I don’t know if you’ve read the book. It’s by Don Miller, a single Christian man, who has the gift of story telling. It’s great stuff. Continue reading →